Give It To Me, Baby by maniacalmuse
by BotheredContest
Summary: I'm pretty sure I regret this already. It was either enter the contest or print this story out and set it on fire. I'm still not sure I made the right choice…


**Pairing: Bella x Edward**

**Rating: M**

**Word Count: 2163**

**Disclaimer: All things Twilight is the sole property of Stephenie Meyer. No copyright infringement is intended.**

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**Give It To Me, Baby**

**(Uh huh, uh huh)**

Sorry, moving along…

It was the best of times, it was the worst of times.

Just kidding. It was nothing but good, fun, not-too-angsty-but-not-too-fluffy times at Forks High School, where the newly-formed Drama Club were having their first rehearsal.

The production was Romeo and Juliet—of course—and our favorite couple, Bella Swan and Edward Cullen, had been chosen to play the leads. Of course.

Only Bella and Edward weren't a couple yet (Yet! There is totally a HEA coming, I swear. No flames!) so this story will be mostly about them.

Now. The players were all standing in a circle on the gym stage, listening to Mr. Banner give out directions. Everyone except Jessica Stanley and Lauren Mallory, who were so angry and jealous for not getting the lead themselves (and apparently too stupid to realize they couldn't share the title with each other, either), that they stood back glaring daggers at Bella, who had never done anything but be so plain and cluelessly innocent that all the boys fell head over heels in love with her for some reason that was never quite made clear in the books. Those bitches. Stupid, sneering, kind-of-ugly, jealous bitches. They were the bitchiest bitches who ever bitched bitchily.

Do you hate them yet? Okay good.

Mr. Banner called on Bella, who in all her plain and cluelessly-innocent loveliness, immediately blushed a furious shade of scarlet. She turned so red she looked like she required medical attention, but Edward thought she was beautiful. In fact, her tomato-hued face gave him an instant erection, which he didn't even bother trying to hide because his dick was so big his pants always looked like that anyways.

Anyways…

Bella blushed, and Edward grinned crookedly at her.

"Your line, Isabella," Mr. Banner said, and everyone stepped back while they came together in the center. (Not like _came_, came, but don't worry. We'll get to that part later. Yes, there's a lemon! No haters!)

ANYWAYS…

Bella looked up into Edward's sparkling green eyes. (This is an all-human story so thankfully it was just his eyes that sparkled, because any other kind of sparkling would be weird, amirite?) Edward's gorgeous green eyes sparkled at Bella, and she blushed impossibly deeper, looking more like a cherry than a girl. But Edward still thought she was beautiful, and his erection throbbed in his pants just at the sight of her.

_**Bella:**_"Eduardo, Eduardo. Wherefore art thou, Eduardo?"

"Cut!" Mr. Banner yelled. "Bella, sweetheart. The line is '_Romeo._'"

"That's what I said," Bella insisted. She was blushing so hard her face was almost purple at this point. Why was no one calling 9-1-1?

"No, you said 'Eduardo.'" Mr. Banner said gently, because he could see that Bella was getting teary eyed. Damn, the girl was sensitive AF. "An easy mistake to make! Let's just start over shall we?"

But Bella was already crying.

Her bestest-best-friend Alice bounced over, because that's what Alice did. "There, there, Bella!" Alice exclaimed, wrapping Bella into a ferocious hug that belied her small size. Bella sniffled against Alice's shoulder, even though Alice was so miniature that Bella had to lean over at ninety-degrees to do so.

"Thank you, Ali. I love you," Bella said.

Edward's erection throbbed with jealousy.

"Hey now, I'm Eduardo! Uh, I mean Romeo! I will console my fair lady!" His fiery, coppery-red hair shone like a shampoo commercial in the stage lights. He ran a hand through his already-messy lustrous locks, making it look even more bed-heady and fucktabulous. Bella bit her lip as he smiled at her and a small fire erupted on one of her cheeks.

"It's okay, Bella," Edward said softly, using his script to fan her (literally) burning face. "You can call me anything you want."

"Okay," Bella breathed, wafting smoke in his direction.

Edward coughed but made it look sexy. "And maybe I can call you tomorrow?" he added with yet another crooked smirk. He was smooth like that, you know. Like buttah.

"Cut!" Banner yelled, even though he hadn't said 'action' again after stopping the first time. "Let's circle back to this one, shall we? We'll try something easier, like the end scene. You guys don't mind kissing, do you?"

(See what I did there? Smooth transitions are smooth, too.)

Edward's already-erect erection throbbed excitedly. "Yes! I mean, no! I don't mind kissing my fair Bella."

Bella blushed some more and her face began to crackle like a river of lava. But Edward still thought she was beautiful.

"Okay, wonderful!" Mr. Banner said, clasping his hands and looking excited like a total perv. "Emmett! Please bring out Juliet's casket!"

The big, burly, heavily-muscled muscle man wheeled out a magnificent box he had built all by himself. At seventeen years old he already knew he would do some kind of building job, like carpentry or construction. He was a good B-character like that.

"Here you go, Bella," he said. "Can I help you climb on top?"

It was a totally innocent gesture even though it sounded kind of like Emmett was asking Bella to climb on top of _him_, you know, but Edward was immediately filled with the burning jealously of a thousand fiery hells. (Because jealous guys are HAWT, amirite again?)

"Hey, back off, man!" Edward seethed, glaring at his best friend, Emmett. (Did I forget to mention that? Sorry.) "Do you want me to tell Rosalie that you made eye contact with another girl? What did Bella ever do to you that you want her _dead_?!"

He was right. Emmett's girlfriend Rosalie was SO mean and scary that no one, not even the teachers, dared to talk to Emmett without her permission. He was actually pretty sad and lonely, poor guy. Good thing Rosalie was extra gorgeous and a tigress in the sack too, or it would be kind of hard to imagine what he saw in her.

Emmett slunk off in search of Rose. They'd have sex and then he'd feel better.

Moving along…

"Excellent!" Mr. Banner exclaimed. "Bella, Edward, let's use this tension and channel it into our roles! Juliet, Romeo thinks you're _dead_, but you're not, and now he wants to die too. Isn't that ROMANTIC?!" (It's really not.)

Bella climbed lithely on top of the box Emmett had built and lay down. She wasn't blushing quite so furiously anymore so her face was merely steaming, and Edward thought she was the most beautiful brown-haired, brown-eyed, red-faced girl he'd ever seen.

His erection … did something. I'm not quite sure anymore.

"Aaand, action!" Mr. Banner exclaimed. "Edward, your line…"

A true performer, Edward slammed his hands down on either side of Bella's head and looked down at her forlornly.

"Here's to my love!

O true apothecary, thy drugs are quick,

Thus with a kiss I die."

He leaned down and placed a chaste kiss on Bella's lips. It would have been a lovely scene, but Bella's blood boiled at her first ever physical contact with a boy and she grabbed Edward's tousled tresses, smashing his face to hers. (Ow.)

Their lips crashed together in a frantic, passionate kiss, and before anyone knew what was happening, Edward had climbed up on top of the casket with Bella and they were dry humping like a couple of horny teens.

Mr. Banner opened his mouth to yell _"Cut!"_, but decided to let this play on. He was always open to artistic interpretation, and felt this sexualized display held some modern merit—the perv.

Now this was only Bella and Edward's first date (Or was it?), but they were just _so_ perfect and made for each other that they knew without a doubt that the time was right. As in right now.

"Bella, I love you," Edward said lovingly. "May I please prove it by being a total gentleman and providing you with at least three earth-shattering orgasms, all with my dick, here on our very first non-awkward and pain-free time?"

"Please," Bella whimpered. She didn't know how to be sexy, but Edward thought she was sexy anyway. I think you get the point by now.

They proceeded to tear each other's clothes off—no really, there were scraps of fabric flying everywhere—and then Edward positioned his irrationally enormous cock at her waiting entrance.

Mrs. Cope, the assistant director I completely forgot to mention before, crossed herself and pulled out her cellphone to record this for later. For though she was a good wife and always assured her husband that 'Dad Bods' were in, who honestly wanted to fantasize to that? Don't lie. I guess she was a perv, too.

The crowd gasped as Edward oh-so-very-very-slowly inched his monstrosity of a member into Bella's _extremely_ tight hole. He marveled at her virginal tightness. She was so tight his eyes rolled back in his head as she squeezed him with such a vice-like grip that some blood supply was cut off to his amazingly amplified appendage.

"Oh god, baby, you're so tight," he gasped while starting to thrust. He could do that even though she was _so tight_, because at the same time she was just super ooper dooper wet. Slick. Dripping. Moi-i-i-i-i-i-st. (Emphasis on the T.)

"Ugh! Edward!" Bella screamed. Seriously. It was loud and screechy. People in the crowd flinched. "You've only been fucking me for thirty seconds on my very first time, but I swear to gah, I'm going to cum!" (It's 'come' as a verb, but whatever.)

"Not yet!" Edward growled, ferociously grabbing her ass with as he pounded into her relentlessly. "You'll cum when I tell you to!" (Hot, right? I mean really, what virgin doesn't love a little BDSM thrown in there? Meow.)

"Yes, Master!" Bella cried, because she just had an instinct for these things.

The crowd was taking bets now to see who would finish first, except for Jessica and Lauren who were crying and fingering themselves in a corner. (Freaks. They're bitches and everybody hates them though, so who cares.)

Edward had just pulled ahead in the pool as the first to blow his formidable load, when suddenly Bella screamed, "I'm cumming, Edward! I'm cumming!"

She pulsated on Edward's cock, moaning and groaning as she milked him like a damn man-cow. Edward thrust one more time and Bella screamed again as her second orgasm crashed through her. Yes, _crashed_. Like a tidal wave or something. It swept her off in a sea of pleasure she'd never known before, because at seventeen she'd never touched a boy _or_ herself, it would seem.

IDK.

Anyways, Bella was 2-0 on Edward now, because that makes total sense for both of their first times, and she was still raring to go for the third 'O' Edward had promised her.

"Please, Edward, give it to me!" she begged while a little more than half the watching crowd begrudgingly handed over twenty dollars to the winners. People were starting to shuffle out, bored now, while Jasper, who had been held up in Cavalry Club, burst through the gym doors, out of breath.

"I heard a commotion and thought y'all might be needin' my help!" he panted in his super-sexy Southern accent.

"Jazzy!" Alice squealed, bounding up to him and jumping into his arms. (Who's a spider monkey now?) "Edward and Bella are just losing their virginity to each other. Isn't it beautiful?!"

"Uh…" said Jasper, eyeing the mess of sweat and bodily fluids undulating for all to see. "Sure, Ali. Whatever you say." He'd never had an opinion of his own around his little sprite of a girlfriend, but that was okay because … I don't know why. It's just how it is, okay?

"Want to come and help me re-categorize my wardrobe according to color theory within the cycles of the moon?" she asked him, and Jasper nodded. He never said no to her for any reason, not ever, no matter how inane or nonsensical her ideas were. That's true love.

They left while Edward and Bella were still going at it like battery-powered bunnies. Edward's superhuman stamina showed no signs of waning, and Bella was writhing underneath him, desperate to reach nirvana for a third time in six minutes.

So they did it some more, and some more, and some more, and some more … until they both decided that they were going to orgasm at the _exact_ same time. It could happen. Totally. "Aaaah!" they cried in unison, thrusting against each other so hard that sparks flew out of their genitals.

Bella began to tremble and shake, her bodaciously-blushing body heating up to catastrophic proportions, and then _POOF_, she was gone, burned up in a tragic case of spontaneous human combustion by orgasm.

Edward still has the scars to this day.

**The End**

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**A/N: So, I know I promised you a HEA and then Bella died. *shrugz* Sorry not sorry. This is my story and I do what I want. (No flames!) Please review! (No flames.)**


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